Staying Present

Something has been on my heart lately.  We have a lot of turmoil and trials going on around us right now, as a family.  Loved ones going through a lot, and if they're going through a lot then we're going through it right along with them. 

I want to be there in whatever way possible and Tim and I have been.  The thing is, it can take a lot out of you mentally, spiritually and emotionally if you aren't in the right place in your own life with the Lord.  If you are not filled up and full of Christ you cannot give to others and have anything left for yourself or you immediate family.  The point of this blog from the beginning has always been intentionality in every area of life but especially in being a wife and mom.

The Lord really starting teaching me this when Tim had his accident almost 16 months ago.  I could not control what had already happened and we had to lean on the Lord for strength like we never had before.  Then the road of troubles started for some of our loved ones right around the same time and I was not handling it well at first. I am a fixer and a doer for others and I was taking it on myself and it was leading litterally to stomach problems.  Let me tell you........you CANNOT take on the weight of your loved ones problems, you cannnot fix things for someone else, you cannot control decisions of others and if you are trying to.........stop.  I've been there and it will make you sick not to mention it will take you out of the "present" with those that matter most, your husband and kiddos.  After a couple of weeks of being sick on and off I realized this last year.  Since then I have found that I must have boundaries as much as I loved these people, my husband and kids are the most important thing.
The most important thing is that my household be filled with the Peace and Joy of Jesus Christ..........no matter what is going on around us.

I was reminded of that this last week in my daily devotional Jesus Calling and again in church yesterday when we were singing a song called Consume Me from the Inside Out.
The passage in Jesus Calling for March 24th said the following:
"This is a time in your life when you must learn to let go:  of loved ones, of possesions, of control.  In order to let go of something that is precious to you, you need to rest in My Presence, where you are complete.  Take time to bask in the Light of My Love.  As you relax more and more, your grasping hand gradually opens up, releasing your prized possesssion into My care.  You can feel secure, even in the midst of cataclysmic changes, through awareness of My continual Presence.  The One who never leaves  you is the same One who never changes:  I am the same yesterday, today and forever.  As you release more and more things into My care, remember that I never let go of your hand.  Herein lies your security, which no one and no circumstance can take from you." (based on Psalm 89:15, Heb 13:8, Isaiah 41:13)

Isn't that AMAZING to know.  I was thinking about this in church yesterday...........I'm a very visual thinker.  I was picturing myself and Jesus standing holding hands.  Then I was litterally picturing everything that is going on around me in the lives of those I hold most dear and it was all swirling around me like a tornado.  But I was standing in the middle holding the hand of Christ.  It was calm in the middle because I was making the CHOICE to stand with the Lord in the middle of the circumstances. 

Whatever you are in the middle of whether it be your own or the circumstances of those you love it's your choice where you are standing.  I have done both and let me tell you it's much calmer to stand in the middle with Christ and let him worry about the details.

It is a daily thing sometimes of making that choice, because I want to help those around me.  But sometimes........a lot of the time, there is nothing more you can do but hold the hand of Christ and pray.  And let me tell you that your husband and kids need you in the "present" with them and the only way to do that is to give whatever it is to Christ.  And I can testify to you that if you can completely do that He will give you His Peace and His Joy in whatever and I mean WHATEVER the present circumstances might be.

Today I was reading Isaiah 26:1-4............pleas go read and claim it for your family daily!!

Doing It All

I was talking to someone the other day and she said of another mom, "I'm so impressed because she does it all."  She went on to list all the things the other mom did and as I listened it actually made me sad.  They weren't things that would be drawing her closer to her family or husband at all.  Isn't that the way the world is?  So about accomplishments, and how many things we got done this day and how many places we went.  If we're stressed and frazzled and running a million places and managing to take care of our family we're "doing it all."

This has actually been on my mind for weeks.  I think that we should have a different standard as christians for "doing it all."  I truly believe Jesus views that phrase in a completely different light then the world does.  And so should we.  We should view it with Spiritual eyes and an eternal meaning.  To me "doing it all" is striving with the Lord's help to raise my kiddos to love and honor Him and others above all else.  To me "doing it all" is putting my husbands needs first and loving him in a tangible way.  To me "doing it all" is studying his word and asking him to grow me in the areas he sees that I need it.  I'm telling you that if we're giving it our utmost in these areas we're "doing it all" in Jesus eyes.

I just believe that we can simplify things as christians and be so less frazzled and stressed.  The Lord wants us to simplfy our lives so that we have time to focus on what's important............and that's the eternal.  It's not if we got our daughter to her 10 gymnastics lessons this week!  Okay I'm exaggerating a little, but you know that you know someone like that.  And then they fall into bed at night too tired to have barely kissed their kids goodnight let alone prayed with them and they definately didn't spend a moment of quality time with their man. 

Yes, I'm a little riled up about this.  Because we never get these moments back with our children and it's our job to "do it all" for them...........eternally speaking.

So, these are some practical things that we do in our house.  Let me say that we don't have it all figured out and will be striving to "do it all" in Jesus eyes til the day we die.  But we definately try to make it our daily focus.  Back to the practical:):
~The kids never do more than one sport each.  And they do not always have to be doing something.  Isaac has been done with football since November and is taking a break from anything.  So he actually has down time after school.  Kids need down time and don't have it enough these days.
~We eat dinner together on average 5 nights a weeks.  I make dinner and we sit down together.  I know that some moms work and it doesn't have to be anything crazy and gourmet.  As a matter of fact last night I was exhausted so we all ate something of our choice, but we sat down together at the table, TV OFF and ate and talked.  I was astounded at some statistics I found.  I don't think some parents take this simple thing serious enough.  The statistics are from a study done by the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse at Columbia University.  Kids who eat a sit down dinner with their families on a regular basis are 40% more likely to get As and Bs in school.  They are also less likely to smoke, drink, do drugs, get depressed, develop an eating disorder or consider suicide.  Can you believe that?!  That's huge and obviously important.
~Another thing we do is plan family nights on the calendar and I literally pencil them in.  It could be as simple as playing a board game....my kids love that.  Or making some popcorn and watching a movie together.  Last week we went miniature golfing..........I'm the champ by the way!:)  I think it's good to teach my kids to lose gracefully!  Haha!
~Every night we sit in one of the kids rooms and have family time with the Lord.......we always switch off to be fair, you know how kids are:)  So, we have a little book for each of the kids that I talked about in a previous blog, Jesus Calling that we read from.  It has some scriptures at the bottom, and then we discuss it together.  And the kids will come up with the coolest questions that spark the best discussions.

Anyway those are just a few things we do and believe me we are constantly learning and asking the Lord for fresh ideas for our family.  I encourage you to take your responsibilities as Mom and Wife seriously and to view them "eternally."  Let's "do it all" the way Jesus wants us to and not the way the world says we're supposed to.  We're in this world but not of it and I encourage you it is so possible to live differently, not easy sometimes but possible.

Like I said this has been on my heart for weeks and then I opened my Jesus Calling devotional today and it was like it's on the Lord's heart too:)  This is what todays page said based on Eph. 4:1-6 and John 10:4:
I love you for who you are, not for what you do.  Many voices vie for control of your mind, especially when you sit in silence.  You must learn to discern what is My voice and what is not.  Ask My Spirit to give you this discernment.  Many of My children run around in circles, trying to obey the various voices directing their lives.  This results in fragmented, frusterating patterns of living.  Do not fall into this trap.  Walk closely with Me each moment, listening for My directives and enjoying My Companionship.  Refuse to let other voices tie you up in knots.  My sheep know My voice and follow Me wherever I lead.

Isn't that awesome?!!  Let's ask the Lord today to help us listen only to His voice and he will help us "DO IT ALL" for His GLORY!